Are The Forties Really That Fabulous?
Apparently, I’m about to be fabulous next month. Because everyone becomes fabulous when they turn 40, it seems. Fierce too. At least that’s what all the t-shirts, birthday cards and memes tell me.
I’m actually taking a huge step in admitting this upcoming milestone. I haven’t willingly talked about my age since the other milestone a decade ago. I am not handling this aging thing quite as well as I thought I would.
It doesn’t help that my daughter spent the weekend reminding me of my age. Apparently, I am not allowed to even jokingly use certain lingo anymore. This is a text exchange my 9-year-old had with me about dad:
She laughed at me. Thank you daughter, for reminding me that I am old and certainly NOT a teenager. She also told me later on that day at the store that I needed to buy skinny jeans because they will make me look younger. I would use a rolling eye emoji to convey my emotions about that statement, but I think those are off limits for me now too.
I’ve been dreading this birthday for months. Don’t get me wrong. I do appreciate another year of life. But dang! It just got real.
Turning 40 isn’t all bad. I’ve learned to give people and situations a figurative middle finger and move on, because life is just too short.
I know I’ll probably never see that 4-pack again, and I’m ok with that. Because I am going to eat that donut. But just one. Can’t get too lax because my health is more important than ever now. See how I did that? Mixing a little freedom with a responsible awareness of the consequences. That’s 40 for ya.
But yet, it’s all the other baggage that comes with getting older that bothers me. I’ve got aches and pains I never had before. For instance, my doctor recently diagnosed me with Sciatica. And then he says “It sucks getting older, doesn’t it?” Gasp! Did he really just say that to me? In all my years of doctor visits, I have never been told my ailment was related to getting older. Oh my god. I can’t deal!
Oh and let’s not forget all the articles about how 40-somethings are supposed to look. I guess I am now limited to certain hairstyles:
A few days ago, I was reading something about retirement benefits and it mentioned the Social Security Life Expectancy Calculator. Out of curiosity, I made the mistake of going to it. I entered my sex and birthdate. It said I had an additional life expectancy of 45.6 years. You mean my life is almost half over?!? I know that I won’t live forever, but seeing my possible death age on the screen in front of me was too much to bear! I’m middle-aged!!!
People already tell me the equivalent of “you look good…for 40.” I remember when my youthfulness was not a surprise, or something to be pointed out. Because I was actually considered young!
Ok. Enough now. I have spent a good 6 months having a mini-breakdown. I think I’ve got it out of my system and I am ready to embrace this new decade of life. I’ve done a lot in my 40 years and I have few regrets. Ok, maybe one big one, but we won’t talk about that.
So, cheers to 40. I might be limping to it (no, seriously, my sciatica is really acting up right now) but I am happy, loved and enjoying every minute.
I’ll probably spend my birthday having a quiet day with my family. My husband will be teasing me about being over-the-hill (even though he’s older than me). My daughter will be fawning over me with homemade cards and gifts. My oldest son won’t care, because all he wants is cake. And the baby adores me no matter what. If this is what 40 looks like, it truly is fabulous.
Featured image credit: Dave Haygarth
