You Can’t Go Home Again…But You Can Visit

This last week my family and I took a vacation back to our hometown of Toledo, Ohio. It was a much anticipated trip very different from the only two visits we’ve had since leaving. My husband went back in 2015 for his father’s funeral. I went back in March of this year for my father’s funeral. These were not the homecomings either one of us wanted.

But this time, we went as a planned vacation during the 4th of July holiday. Of course there has to be some drama. My youngest son was running a fever right before we left and it only got worse upon arrival. The second day into our trip, I knew something was wrong and we went to Urgent Care. Apparently his mild congestion turned into a double ear infection from the plane ride. Great! Last visit to Ohio he was diagnosed with an ear and respiratory infection the day before we flew there and my husband went to Urgent Care with bronchitis during our stay. I’m beginning to wonder if Ohio wants us to stay away.

But even with that setback, we had a great trip. We caught up with old friends and family and stopped at some of our familiar hang out spots. Our first stop was one of my favorite parks growing up: Olander Park. I always enjoyed sitting by the water and watching the ducks. I don’t know if they still have it, but I used to take paddle boat rides there too (although I would always get hot and tired of pedaling after awhile). It was good to spend time there again with my own children.

I am a picture addict, so I finally got a selfie stick (my husband teased me mercilessly about it). I had never used it before and didn’t realize until later that we were doing it all wrong. The pole should definitely not be in the picture.

The next day we had an open house at my mother-in-law’s house. We saw some people we hadn’t seen since we left over 3 years ago, which meant they were just now meeting our youngest two boys. My littlest one was not feeling well due to his ears, so most never got to see what a happy pleasant kid he truly is. He screamed almost the whole day. We will have to show them next time, although our luck with health and Ohio has been iffy as I said.

My oldest son was also playing hard to get for some reason at times. He can be moody like his dad (not me of course). And my daughter is always happy to socialize, though she was just as happy to go off by herself to read. That was a new side of her, because she’s always needed to be the center of attention. I guess having two younger brothers has taught her to share the spotlight.

I also know it was a special treat for my husband to see his kids playing in the same house and yard that he did growing up. He even got to introduce his children to the neighbors he terrorized lived next to as a youth.

We had planned to watch the fireworks since we were visiting over the 4th, but with our little one having problems and the whole family sleep deprived and a little tired, we decided to skip it. I had awful visions of sleepy, cranky children howling at the moon and being stuck in traffic until well after midnight. Sometimes the short term payoff is just not worth the long term aftermath. Life with kids!

As our trip continued, we hit more of our favorite places. Of course being a family that loves the Wolverines, we had to go to the Buckeye & Wolverine shop we used to live around the corner from. It was fun taking the kids in there and getting some new gear. It’s the little traditions and things from your previous life that you miss when you didn’t even realize it.

Before our vacation ended, we went downtown to the docs by the water. I used to have lunch there almost everyday when I worked at the nearby library. It was a soothing escape from the sometimes hectic environment of working with the public.

And of course we couldn’t leave without having a Watermelon Brain Freeze at Toozer’s! Every summer, my daughter and I had to go there on a daily basis! Whether by car, bike or foot we were there. My husband would just shake his head at our Toozer’s obsession. Although he never turned down a Brain Freeze of his own!

And we wanted to swing by our old house to show our oldest son where he spent the first year of his life. And to remind our daughter of the amazing times we had in that house and neighborhood. I moved into that house when I married my husband. I spent 6 months of bedrest in that house when I was pregnant and brought my miracle baby home to it. We had fun times trick-or-treating around the neighborhood on Halloween. And spent so many nights by a crackling fireplace in the winter, sipping hot chocolate while the weather outside truly was frightful. I’m sure it was a punch in the gut for my husband to see a “Go Bucks” sign in front of the house now. My how times have changed! Ouch.

It felt good to go home and it not be to grieve but to celebrate life and each other. Our losses made us appreciate those we have even more. But we also realized that our perceptions of our hometown have changed. It feels different. In some ways it is different. I miss the memories we made more than the place itself. And if our families weren’t there, I don’t know that I would feel the need to come back. The economic downturn drove us out unfortunately and I always worried about there being a future for my children there. Sometimes I feel like you really can’t go home again.

But no matter how far we stray, no matter how many places we live, our little corner of Northwest Ohio will always be home for us. It’s not perfect. It could be prettier. The sun could shine a little more. The winters could be less harsh. But it’s where we had a lot of good times and we will always think of it fondly. We had a great life there and wouldn’t have left had circumstances been different.

And now after seeing some of the amazing sights of this great country of ours, I came back this time around and saw something more in the place that I lived most of my life in. The lakes and the greenery had a beauty that I never noticed before. I had a new appreciation for the quieter streets and less congested highways. It was great to see houses that don’t all look the same with real backyards again. I complained a lot before I left, but you can find something special about wherever you are, if you just open your eyes and stop and smell the roses. Or pick them all and leave a path of destruction like my son.

Featured Image By: Jimmy Emerson, DVM